Wow. What a train-wreck show. That shiz was crazy!

I could go into each performance, but really, the only thing anyone is talking about today is PaulaGate.

The night started off rather uneventfully, with Ryan telling us this week's mentor would be none other than Neil Diamond. Love him! (Ooh, David Cook, please sing "Sweet Caroline." Pretty please. No? Bummer. That would have been awesome.)

Ryan said everyone would sing two songs. That's 10 performances in one hour. Too much! Frankly, I'm surprised they didn't take advantage of the two-song format to stretch the show out even more. They do love their extra-long shows. And it's not like anyone would miss "Hell's Kitchen."

Because of the two-songs-per-person format, the show felt extremely rushed. Far from the professionally staged show "Idol" usually puts on, this felt like amateur hour. Honestly, I think my high school put on a more organized talent show back in the ... oh, dates are irrelevant.

And then there was PaulaGate. There are a few theories on what the hell happened: 1) Paula watched the dress rehearsal the night before and so had a good idea of how the contestants would do; 2) the producers feed the judges (or maybe even just Paula) lines of what they're supposed to say, presumably so they can somewhat control which contestants get eliminated or get to stay; 3) Paula's a freakin' looneyhead.

Now, #3 is a given. And #1 doesn't bother me too much. I don't have a problem with judges seeing the performances in dress rehearsals, as long as they don't use that performance as the basis for their critique. They should only judge the actual performance on the night of the show. So if #1 were true, I'd be upset, but it wouldn't make me stop watching the show forever.

However, #2 would. But really, would it be that surprising if it were true? Do we really believe there isn't an inordinate amount of manipulation going on behind the scenes anyway? The producers have their hand in everything. What's to stop them from telling the judges -- or Paula, anyway -- what to say? But if that's the case, she's doing a horrible job of delivering it. She never makes any sense. And if they are feeding her lines, they should fire the illiterate who's telling her what to say.

Whatever the reason, I firmly believe that all the craziness was completely unfair to Jason. Imagine having to perform your song after a judge told you they hated it. "Look, I know you haven't sung it yet, but you're going to suck. But hey, good luck!"

I want them to come on tonight and say that what happened yesterday was a mistake. That even though Jason got the lowest number of votes, they won't vote him off and they'll all get another chance next week. I want that to happen, but it won't, because "Idol" never admits its mistakes.

So I fear for Jason. Well, not enough to vote for him, but I'd hate to see that goofy grin go. Plus, who's gonna eat all those brownies when he's gone?